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Im just some pathetic kid who pours ink onto tainted pages.

Im the one who fell in love and stayed that way.

January 20th, 2012

Nine months :D @ 05:10 pm

Nine months with Steven,

and I'm still soooooooo in love <3


January 15th, 2012

Sorry I can't be perfect @ 09:37 pm

Fricken mom always tells me to do stuff, and when I do it, it's not fucking good enough.

I was making pancakes the other day, and she basically told me I was doing it wrong. How the fuck do you make pancakes wrong?! I made them like every Sunday in Alberta - which was ever Sunday for 7 months! Pretty sure I know how to made pancakes. My mom NEVER makes a hot breakfast, so who the fuck does she think she is? 

Earlier today, I was doing something ... I think carving a roasted chicken ... and I apparently did that wrong too.

I also brush my teeth wrong, according to mom. What does she even know about clean teeth? Her teeth are all rotten and she wears dentures. I have braces. I brush my teeth religiously.

Theres so much other shit that I do wrong, but I can't even keep track anymore. I hate it.... I feel so worthless when she tells me everything I do isn't right... I try, and that should count at least. I just wish she'd see how she's ruining me. How much I just want to hate her, how much it makes me angry to see her killing herself, and acting like she's queen shit.

aSFGFDHSHYZSETWERYHTYKIUDREWtklyiewqrey{(:ygluitswzx fdh


January 6th, 2012

The Mortal Instruments 30 Challenge <3 @ 03:04 am


Day 1- Most favorite book - I like City of Glass the Best.

Day 2- Favorite ShadowHunter - JACE HERONDALE <3

Day 3- Least Favorite Shadowhunter - Valentine, obvs.

Day 4- Downworlders: Fair Folk, Children of the Night, Children of Lilith, or Children of the Moon? CHILDREN OF LILITH <3 Oh Magnus Bane <3

Day 5- Most favorite Downworlder - MAGNUS BANE! <3

Day 6- Most favorite Rune - Fearless rune. So badass. Iratze's are cool too.

Day 7- Most favorite pair/s - JACE AND CLARY. And Luke and Jocelyn :3 OH OH AND ALEC AND MAGNUS.

Day 8- Demon you would like to have as your soldier - I don't like the idea of using demons to fight for you.

Day 9- Most favorite chapter in City of Bones. - I cant even remember what chapters said what.

Day 10- Isabelle or Maia for Simon? - Isabelle.

Day 11- Actress you like to portray Clary.

Day 12- Actress you like to portray Isabelle - as much as I hate Megan Fox...I think she'd look best for Isabelle.

Day 13- Most favorite quote of Jace - "To love is to destory, and to be loved is to be destroyed."

Day 14- Most favorite quote of Magnus Bane - "I don't remember the Clave inviting you into the Glass City, Magnus Bane."
"They didn't," Magnus said." Your wards are down."
"Really?" The Consul's voice dripped sarcasm. " I hadn't noticed."
Magnus looked concerned. "That's terrible. Someone should have told you." He
glanced at Luke. "Tell him the wards are down."

Day 15- Your weapon of choice - Seraph blades and Izzy's whip <3

Day 16- Least favorite part/chapter in City of Glass - THEY SLEPT IN THE SAME BED BUT DIDNT DO IT.

Day 17- Favorite Jace/Clary scene - Clary's birthday, in the greenhouse <3

Day 18 - Least favorite member of the Clave - I used to hate Maryse ... but I kind of like her now :3

Day 19- Which City do you like most? Bones, Ashes, or Glass? Glass <3 ..and Ashes.

Day 20- Most favorite angel name - Ithuriel <3

Day 21- The Mortal Cup, Sword, or Mirror? Mortal cup, yo.

Day 22- Jace/Clary or Simon/Clary? JACE AND CLARY

Day 23- If you were a faerie, would you be a kelpie, a phouka, a nixie, or a selkie? - Nixie <3

Day 24- Animal you’d like to have as a pet - Cat, like Magnus <3

Day 25- Let’s say you ate a faerie food. Which would you prefer: run naked with antlers on your head or be turned to an animal?  - Naked with antlers :3

Day 26- Most favorite quote of Isabelle - "Nothing less than seven inches. Thats my motto."

Day 27- Most favorite Alec/Magnus scene - MAKEOUT SCENE BEFORE THE WAR <3

Day 28- If you could speak any language, what would it be? - Warlock languages <3

Day 29- Favorite and least favorite chapter/s in City of Ashes - Idkkkkkkkkkk

Day 30- If you were given a chance to change any scene in any book, what would you change? - I would've not included Simon during Clary's birthday makeout with Jace.

December 30th, 2011

LDR 30 Day Challenge - but I'll do it now, in one night. @ 12:41 am

1: Your names; Katharine and Steven <3

2: Your ages; I'll be 18 in June, where as he'll be 23 in October.

3: Your locations; I live in Ontario, and he lives in British Columbia.

4: How did you meet?; We met on an online site.

5: Since when have you been together?; We started dating (for the first time) in March, 2008 (the 23rd, to be exact), and that only went til the 25th of August of that year. We kept in touch, still, and then started dating again, November 8th, 2009, until June 28th, 2010. We got back together April 20th, 2011, and we're still together for over 8 months. (Sorry for the life story).

6: What is the most random thing you know about him/her? Steven can purr. :3

7: How do you communicate with each other?; Texting and calling, mostly, as well as MSN for videocalling. We might start to use Skype together now.

8: Favourite thing you’ve given him/her?; I think the dog tag would personally be my favourite thing that I've given him. It was the first thing I've ever given to any boyfriend, and I'm happy it was him. He seems to not enjoy it as much as I do though.

9: Favourite thing she/he has given you?; I love my ring, kthanksbye. - oh, and his shirt and sweater. And the shirts he got for me. And Tanner. I love everything he sends me <3

10: Favourite thing about him/her?; I love how he's so ... real. He can feel pain, feel happiness, feel love, feel anger - I wouldn't have him any other way.

11: Pick one thing you miss (I know there are 19238923842039402394 things) and describe it in detail; I miss the way I felt in his arms ... like, as cliché as it sounds, a puzzle piece fit into it's destined piece. It just felt ... right. The whole world, while we were together, was not the original world I had lived in just moments before I saw him standing in front of me. No ... I miss OUR world.

12: How would you define love?; Love is caring, it's being together, talking, laughing, playing - love is happy. But love is also struggling. It's jealous, greed, frustration and all those other things. Love, most of all, is being able to combine the two types of love, and living with a balance of it. Nothing is perfect unless it is balanced. Love, to me, is perfect.

13: What do you think is the hardest thing about distance?; The physical part of it all, for me, I guess. How many times can one really I say "I love you" and just expect that to be enough sometimes? Sometimes ... all I need is a reassuring glance, a hug, a kiss ... yeah, and making love would be pretty phenomenal, as well.

14: Describe a moment you had with him/her last time you were together. (If you haven’t met, describe how the perfect moment would be); We were in my room, laying in my bed, and we were kissing, and our hands were completely comfortable doing their own things ... feeling the smoothness of each others bodies, the curves, contours and muscles ... your hands lingering at my waist... my little gasps when your lips found my neck ... It was just very beautiful.

15: Favourite love (LDR or not) song?; So In Love; Iris; From Where You Are; Slide; Thunder ... etc :D

16: Favourite love (LDR or not) movie?; Gnomeo and Juliet, because we watched it together, but mine would add The Notebook, A Walk to Remember and Dear John.

17: Favourite love (LDR or not) quote?; "I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you. I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out."

18: Post a picture of the two of you together. (If you don’t have one, post a picture of something you can/could relate to); 

19: I know there’s not one thing, but choose one of your favourite things to hear her/him say.; I love when he says "I love you," first ... or when he talks about our future, and how excited he is and how proud he'll be to call me his wife, and for him to be my husband.

20: Is there something you regret? (either about the relationship, or something you have done); I regret waiting to long for us to meet. I understand that the reasons were beyond our control ... but we had all those chances ... I also regret losing his trust, and that my mistake is basically the fondation of the relationship as it is today ... if I hadn't messed up, would we even be together now? I don't like thinking about it - I'm happy we're together ... but, I'm sure you can all understand what I'm trying to say ...

21: Give us a little insight (as much as you’re comfortable) on your sex life (either with this person physically, or your general history, or over the phone ha, whatever you want); We have never physically had sex. We do send the occasional sexual text message, and we used to send photos, but we do engage in sexual activity via videocall, and that took 3 years to even happen. I'd say that we've been taking it pretty slow.

22: Share something cute. (A story, something either of you have done, a song, memory, wish, dream); We're writing a novel together. I can't say it'll be anything big in the future ... but it's happening, and it makes me SO happy.

23: Do you have a song? Which one is it? (if you don’t, then what is something that always reminds you of him/her); We have many - our first being Thunder, by BLG. 

24: Describe him/her physically and emotionally/personality-wise; Physically, he's taller than me, fair skinned, with light brown/dark blonde hair, and bluey-green eyes. His smile, to me, is perfect. He has a really hot body - and by that, I mean muscles <3  Emotionally, he tries to be strong ALL of the time, but I think sometimes he forgets that he's only human, and that it's okay to be stressed, or upset. He is strong though. Personality-wise, he's like that smart-ass guy, who's hilarious, and everybody loves him. He's charming, and smart, and quite rationale. He's the type of guy that keeps your head on straight for you, and makes you feel like everything is okay, even though it doesn't feel like it. He's selfless.

25: One thing that he/she does that pisses you off (even if that smile while get you every time); When he's annoyed by me (though he'd never admit it) and is just very cross with me in text messages, or on cam. Yeah, I get mad when he's mad.

26: Sweetest thing he/she has done for you; Sixty hour round trip on a bus to see ... me <3

27: If you had the money/time/connections/whatever to get him/her any gift in the world, what would it be?; I'd buy a big house where we both could live, and he could have one whole floor designated for his army stuff, so he'll never get upset about not having enough room <3 And a new car so his car doesn't keep eating our savings.

28: If you could have him/her with you physically for the next 5 hours, what would you do?; I'd want for my baby to make love to me, over and over again, and just lay in his strong arms ... 5 hours wouldn't be enough. I need forever.

29: When will you see her/him next?; March, hopefully.

30: Where do you see your future going with him/her?; I see him on one knee, proposing to me, asking to be his wife. I see myself in a white dress, and him at the end of the aisle. I see my tummy growing with life, and his love doubling for me, and his child(ren). I see us doing everything we could think of doing together, as bestfriends, as husband and wife, and as two curious people. I see myself crawling into bed with him every single night and waking up to his precious face, and I see myself growing old with this man.


December 28th, 2011

I'm creeping some girls tumblr. I think I should become her bestfriend. @ 08:42 pm

"The Military Girlfriend

Everyone hears of the Military Wife,

Her trials, sacrifices, and devoted life.

She is strong, she is brave, and she is loving indeed,

Standing by her man in his time of need.

But what of others in a similar situation,

Who have made being a miltary girlfriend their main occupation?

They suffer many of the same trials and many of the same fears

Without the security of future years.

Will there be peace or will there be war?

You try to be hopeful but it’s hard to ignore.

The world seems to be falling apart

When, to a soldier, you have given your heart.

Your love runs too deep to escape from it now.

Your hope to be together somewhere, somehow,

When his duty is over and your life can begin.

You wonder if it will happen but don’t question when.

The many heartbreaks and the times you did weep

When he made promises the Miltary couldn’t keep.

But you have learned so much together and come so far.

Others warned you not to fall in love but you already are.

His job is ever-changing and takes him far away.

You think of him always and pray every day—

For his safety, his courage, and his love for you

That he remain steadfast, loyal, and ever true.

Nothing is sure and nothing is set in stone…..

Except that he will leave again and you will be alone,

Holding tightly to your dreams of a future together

When you will at last be able to say the word “forever.”

Tears have become anything but a stranger.

They fall freely in sadness, loneliness, and anger.

But he will never know because you will never tell.

You’ve learned to hide your misery only too well.

A few years? That doesn’t sound like so long.

The letters and phone calls keep your love going strong,

Even when they are few and far between,

In them, his love for you can clearly be seen.

So keep your chin up and a smile on your face.

He is protecting your freedom and keeping you safe.

His heart is strong and his love is true

And don’t ever forget that he is missing you too"


Im just some pathetic kid who pours ink onto tainted pages.

Im the one who fell in love and stayed that way.